Here Comes Trouble: Stories from My Life

"Outstanding…Moore Triumphs! Publishers Weekly

Mike & Friends Blog

Michael Moore

Michael Moore is an Academy-Award winning filmmaker and best-selling author

November 27th, 2010 10:43 AM

He Shoots! He Scores! Obama Suffers Cut Lip But Takes it All the Way for the USA

(As heard this morning on WUSS-AM, Home of DemSports and the Fightin' Wussies)

Sportscaster #1: Well fans, it was a sight to behold. At half time it looked like it was all over for the lanky, amiable Obama who came into this game with huge expectations, but for some reason seemed to peter out somewhere in the first quarter.

Sportscaster #2: Well, let's not forget that Obama inherited much of this team from the last Dem coach and the last Repub coach and I guess what works for one coach doesn't necessarily work so well for another one -- even some 16 years later.

#1: It rarely does. In fact the oldtimers dragged Obama's overall shooting percentage down -- way down.

#2: His teammates couldn't get anything passed down the court, either. Sorta pathetic to watch a team that comes in to play, essentially owns the arena, and they can't score -- and that's with the other team playing with a few men short...

#1: And those who were playing were, let's say, a few cards short themselves, if you know what I mean...

#2: Yes, I certainly do. So the Dems started this game all powered up -- and then it looks like they just gave the ball to the other side and said 'ok, we'll let you decide, we'll play by your rules.'

#1: Incredible. Never seen anything like it in the history of the sport. But remember, the "Fightin" part of the Fightin' Wussies name doesn't have to do with fighting the other team. It's about each player's fight with their teammates as well as their own personal, inner struggle.

#2: Well, Obama and his side took a shellacking, that's for sure in the first half. Now, I don't know what was said back in the locker room during halftime but as soon as the second half began, Obama was like changed man.

#1: He came back loaded for bear!

#2: That's right. On his very first drive to the basket he was unstoppable. They tried to hard foul him but Obama was not going to let anything get in his way!

#1: And when his opponent got the ball, instead of heading over to the sidelines and the bench -- as he did in the first half -- Obama decides to defend the basket with a "take no prisoners" attitude.

#2: So much so he was willing to take an elbow to the mouth and sustained a cut lip that required 12 stitches!

#1: The man with the bleeding heart now had a bleeding lip!

#2: And you know folks, whether he was bleeding Kenyan blood or American blood, he was back in the game within minutes!

#1: And man, what happened after that, well, the other team is still trying to figure out which way is up.

#2: From that point on, It was one Obama drive and slam dunk after another. Wam, bam, Obama!

#1: The other team was in a tizzy. They couldn't figure out what had gotten into him -- and they could see there was no stopping him after that.

#2: The result: A job for everyone. Bankers behind bars. Health care for all. Troops all home. Schools full of smart and happy kids. And, most of all, burgers inside a donut bun, banned. Score! Score! And score! A banner day for the Fightin' Wussies -- who maybe at this point should think about changing their name!

That's all from here...
Michael Moore

Creative Commons License This content is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 License
Tags:

You must log in to comment.

You must be logged in to leave a comment. Log in | Register

My father, Francis (Frank) Moore, passed away this morning a few months shy if his 93rd birthday. He was a great dad I am blessed to have had him in my life. I...

Apr 20th
2:58 AM
Read More

Time to put the cuffs on Chris Christie -- not for the bridge scandal, but for this: Chris Christie's $300m pension proposal broke state anti-corruption...

Apr 18th
7:31 PM
Read More

George W. Bush Debuts New Paintings Of Dogs, Friends, Ghost Of Iraqi Child That Follows Him... www.theonion.com President Bush has a new hobby -- painting! --...

Apr 17th
7:28 PM
Read More

Big new story from David Sirota and Pando on top Christie adviser and appearance of corruption at New Jersey's pension fund: REVEALED: Gov....

Apr 17th
12:41 PM
Read More

FBI Uncovers Al-Qaeda Plot To Just Sit Back And Enjoy Collapse Of United States www.theonion.com WASHINGTON—The FBI announced today that it has uncovered a...

Apr 15th
3:28 PM
Read More

Revealed: Rahm Emanuel's top donor bought stock in Marriott just before it was awarded huge contract pando.com As schools are closed and pensions cut,...

Apr 9th
2:00 PM
Read More

I'll be at First Time Fest today in New York City at the screening of my first film, Roger & Me. Loews Village 7 at 12:30 pm. Come see it on the big...

Apr 5th
9:48 AM
Read More

Revealed: Rahm Emanuel cuts public pensions, diverts money to benefit campaign donors pando.com If you've read the financial news out of Chicago the last...

Apr 4th
2:19 PM
Read More

Please take a moment today to think of Casey Austin Sheehan, son of Cindy and Patrick, who was murdered by U.S. foreign policy in Sadr City, Baghdad ten years...

Apr 4th
2:00 PM
Read More

ICYMI - I've joined this "thunderclap" to support the Connecticut legislators who voted yes on last year's Act Concerning Gun Violence...

Apr 3rd
7:38 PM
Read More

I've joined this "thunderclap" to support the Connecticut legislators who voted yes on last year's Act Concerning Gun Violence Prevention...

Apr 2nd
8:27 PM
Read More

I am opposed to the death penalty, but to every rule there is usually an exception, and in this case I hope the criminals at General Motors will be arrested...

Apr 1st
3:55 PM
Read More

How Long Some in the US Will Survive Under New Health Law ...by Donna Smith www.michaelmoore.com Those who must access care to live and can afford it are not...

Mar 31st
10:13 PM
Read More

Last night, The Good Wife on the East Coast started 40 minutes late due to the overrun of the NCAA basketball game. If you had your DVR set for the show, you...

Mar 24th
5:41 PM
Read More

Watching films today, looking for the ones I'm going to pick for my film festival this summer. I (and a whole bunch of others!) have this thing we put on...

Mar 23rd
4:48 PM
Read More

When the U.S. Health Care System Keeps Killing, Who Cares Enough to Fight? ...by Donna Smith www.michaelmoore.com We have largely forgotten that people are at...

Mar 21st
5:56 PM
Read More

Tell the White House not to give up on Dr. Vivek Murthy's nomination as Surgeon General despite the ferocious opposition from the NRA: Don't give...

Mar 21st
5:38 PM
Read More

This criminal would never see a jail cell, nor would his cronies. In fact, they'd later be rewarded with re-election: Presidential Address on War with...

Mar 19th
9:40 PM
Read More

The crime of the century -- our invasion & slaughter in Iraq -- started 11 years ago tonite in this 7pm (ET) hour, March 19th, 2003: CNN Coverage of...

Mar 19th
9:08 PM
Read More

Washington’s Back-to-the-Future Military Policies in Africa ...by Nick Turse www.michaelmoore.com Nick Turse is an award-winning journalist, historian,...

Mar 17th
4:59 PM
Read More

"I think democracy is the most revolutionary thing in the world." -- Tony Benn, 1925-2014 Tony Benn in 'Sicko'

Mar 14th
10:07 AM
Read More

RIP Tony Benn, one of the UK's greatest leaders: Tony Benn, veteran Labour politician, dies aged 88 www.theguardian.com Former cabinet minister died at...

Mar 14th
9:53 AM
Read More

Please read this important story from K. Ford K.: Am I the Face of the New American Middle Class? www.huffingtonpost.com I began to feel I had slipped so low...

Mar 13th
2:24 PM
Read More

Yesterday Dianne Feinstein revealed that the CIA has been spying on the Senate Intelligence Committee. This is all about the report the committee has produced...

Mar 12th
6:48 PM
Read More

Health Care for All Colorado has brought Mercy Killers, a show written and performed by Michael Milligan about our murderous for-profit healthcare system, to...

Mar 10th
1:08 PM
Read More

Health Care Dramas that Sting and Why We Have to Watch ...by Donna Smith www.michaelmoore.com The realities Milligan has written into the show cut deep into...

Mar 10th
1:02 PM
Read More

Did you know the Lehrer Newshour on PBS has been produced for 20 years by a company owned by conservative cable billionaire John Malone? Me neither. After...

Mar 7th
8:39 PM
Read More

Mr. Obama, if int’l law is so damn crucial . . . | RootsAction.org act.rootsaction.org The Russian intervention deserves criticism. But let’s be clear. The...

Mar 6th
1:21 PM
Read More

Enron billionaire John Arnold thinks everyone should believe him when he says we've got to cut pensions because he's so incredibly rich: John...

Mar 5th
4:20 PM
Read More

Subscribe to Mike's Blog RSS

Click here to suggest an article

Mike's Blog

See More Blogs

Vew the archives

View older articles